Dear Lover ๐Ÿ”Š


dear lover,

move me with your clear direction, hold me in my passion
touch me with each breath you’re taking, melt away my walls
expose what is beneath it all
a glowing force
a dancing flame
a naked woman with no name
dear lover, with your solid presence warm my thin bare shoulders


dear lover, let’s catch morning dew and rain it in our gardens
with true and vivid colours let us paint a path, then run
and laugh with me as we trip and fall
as we change the hue
as our dreams we see
holding hands whilst running free
air between us, air is nothing, my dear lover, trust me!


dear lover, hear the ocean lap its love beneath our heartbeats
it’s ours to sail, to drink, to splash, to cleanse in every day
let us float on its calm surface
trusting, knowing
that we’re carried
we are weightless, we are married!
let’s dive deep into the water, free-dive for the pearls


open me
play with me
let me in

dear lover,
that is all I ask
of body, mind, and soul


Christmas Came Early


Christmas came early – I wasn’t ready!
My fridge was all empty, my house was not cleaned
Nothing was wrapped with beautiful ribbons
Nothing prepared to be opened and seen

Still Christmas came, though I tried to outrun him
To keep him in front, to buy myself time
โ€œI want to be perfect for Christmas!โ€ I told me
Purposeful, whole, enlightened, sublime!

Butย he didnโ€™t care if I was ready
He simply arrived


Yes Christmas came early this year, when you found me
And although I tried to push Christmas away
You untied the ribbons, you unwrapped the wrapping
Of gifts I’d forgotten, of presents astray

You filled up my fridge with all that was missing
You helped me to clean, you brought in a tree
You smiled, and I knew then: thereโ€™s no use in running
‘Cus Christmas will come when HE’s ready, not me!

Gracious Rebel


a gracious rebel
all your life
rebelling, but oh so peacefully

did anyone notice
when you gave them the finger
a graceful gesture
when you told them to fuck off

when you refused by leaving
resisted by staying
objected by saying
excuse me, but


creating boundaries

rocking the boat to the beat of sweet music

oh gracious rebel
I’m right beside you!
fuck the grace
just speak your true voice
no need to rebel
you ARE the rebel!
a gracious rebel
rebelling against the voice inside you
telling you to conform

Swimming ๐Ÿ”Š

ian-espinosa-311604To you
Itโ€™s a beautiful ocean

To you
Itโ€™s warm waves rolling in
Caressing your feet
As they sink a little into wet summer sand

You wave at me from the shore

You shrug as I do not wave back


But Iโ€™m caught in a rip
And my arms are frenetically swimming and swimming and swimming!

To stay where I am
To not drift away
Out into nothingness
Out to where no one will wave from the shore!


Was I born swimming – was I born in this rip?

I don’t even know anymore…


So I swim towards shore
To stay where I am
To not drift away
To see when you wave

Here, in my rip
I feel safe when I swim
Swim towards shore
Swim towards you


And not until he suddenly appears behind me
Not until his strong arms reach for me and pull me out of my rip
Not until he brings me back to the shore, although I’m kicking and screaming
Not until he sits me down on the warm sand and tells me that everything is going to be fine
Not until he holds me – silently, patiently – for minutes and hours and days and months
Not until I finally let go and my body stops swimming

Do I realise
Iโ€™m exhausted

Do I realise I was never safe in that rip
Swimming – to stay where I was
Swimming – to belong in your life for a second or two
As I saw you
See me
From your shore


Until he pulled me out
Your wave pulled me forward
The rip pulled me back
I stayed where I was
I knew nothing else
But MY rip and YOUR wave

I knew nothing else
But swimming